Exclusive Cyber Monday Deals for Hot Single Dudes

Use this promo code to land yourself a new lady. (ME!) Exclusions apply.

Photo: EMS-FORSTER-PRODUCTIONS/Getty Images

Single dudes! Single fellas! Single hombres! Single DILFs!

Don’t miss the best Cyber Monday deal on the market! Save UP TO 90% more time in your life by realizing I’m all you need!

This offer will go fast. (But not too fast because I’m a LADY.)

Start your FREE trial now using promo code THETHIRSTNOEL. (Cannot be combined with any other deals, except the deal I made with myself to find a partner for cuffing season.)

The exclusive opportunity features up to six (6) styles, including:

• champagne-buzzed party girl with lovable anecdotes
• hopeless romantic/writerly type who always thinks she’s in a movie (featuring a soundtrack of emo songs)
• reality TV-watching genius/scholar
• hungover-but-still-savvy professional
• clever witch
• asleep

The code is valid for first-time users only, and may not be used by anyone who isn’t willing to favorite all my tweets.

The promo may only be applied to the following products, while supplies last: