Power Trip

Meet the Existentialist Bodybuilder

‘Powerlifting gave me the butt of my dreams. It also taught me about death.’

Michael A. Brodeur
GEN
Published in
8 min readOct 24, 2018

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Photo by Jesper Aggergaard

When you lift weights enough to look like you lift weights, people have all sorts of questions.

“How much you bench?” (As much as I can.) “What gym do you go to?” (The one that’s open when I go.) “What program are you on?” (Time, dragging us all toward the void as we claw the dirt.) Questions usually stop there.

Programs. Plans. Training. Goals. We’ve come up with a lot of concepts and structures designed to imbue our workouts with a sense of purpose and make the act of repeatedly lifting weights feel like less than a literal exercise in absurdity. Some of them work; most of them don’t — not because the plans are bad, but because we are human and we fail ourselves.

Over the past 10 years or so — as fitness has become our national pastime and preoccupation — I’ve undergone a transformation that has not only bestowed upon me 50 extra pounds of body weight, a butt that (if I may speak for it) refuses to quit, and a new and omnipresent (by my husband’s reporting) cumin-esque musk, but also a not-necessarily-motivational mind-set about what it is I’m doing at the gym, why I go, what program I am indeed on.

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Michael A. Brodeur
GEN
Writer for

I write about classical music for @washingtonpost and gym stuff @To_Failure. My first book, “SWOLE” is due out Fall 2022 from Beacon Press.