Column

The Niceness Trap

Both Biden and Trump called out young women for not being ‘nice’ this week — because they think that will shut us up

Jessica Valenti
GEN
Published in
3 min readSep 25, 2019

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A photo of Greta Thunberg.
Activist Greta Thunberg attends a press conference where 16 children from across the world, present their official human rights complaint on the climate crisis to the United Nations Committee on the Rights of the Child. Photo: Kena Betancur/Getty Images

FFrom the time we are young, women are told to be nice. To be polite. To smile more often, to not curse or confront, to be pleasant — and most of all, to make others feel comfortable.

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Jessica Valenti
GEN
Writer for

Feminist author & columnist. Native NYer, pasta enthusiast.