When Abortion Is Sacred
Thirteen weeks into my twin pregnancy, I had to make the devastating decision to terminate one baby while remaining pregnant with the other
It was the spring of 2016, the day after my birthday, and the little window finally said “Pregnant.” Excited as we were, it took a few weeks to set up a doctor’s appointment. I hadn’t remembered being so sick, so nauseous, so tired the last time. No matter, I thought, it must be because I’m a bit older.
We turned up for our first appointment at the nine-week mark, and I was nervous. Uncharacteristically so. As we waited for the ultrasound, I sat there clutching myself. “Do you have a big apartment?” the doctor asked casually. “Yes, we moved about a year ago and have much more space,” I answered matter-of-factly—as if it were another typical New York question about whether the trains had been running that day. “Good,” she replied. “Because you’re having twins.”
Panic set in. “But we conceived naturally, we didn’t use IVF. How could this be?” and “We can’t handle twins — we already have two kids with my son and my stepson.” It felt overwhelming. We left the office and aimlessly wandered the streets. My husband looked at me and said, “I love you so much.” And he cried.
